Ten o' Clock

I am the best at coming in the door, rushing to my closet and slipping into my comfy clothes faster than you can say pajama pants! It is not 10:00 pm and I am still in my work clothes AND I was up at 5:45 am...what is wrong with me?!?! I even had a dinners by the dozen meal in the crock pot before I left for work this morning as to avoid a hassle with dinner. At 9:00 I found myself wandering the aisles at Hy-Vee with glazed eyes contemplating WHAT to provide for Brigg to feed 18 people tomorrow at preschool. Funny how that happens. I have the calendar a month in advance and I am still preparing a mere 12 hours before needed. A clogged sink, a preschool meeting, American Idol and snuggle time with my babies...I'm a happy mommy. Sticking with it at my place of employment and I am no longer planning on telling everyone when I take my test next. That way I don't have to share bad news!!! Thanks for all the support. It's 10:03 and I am going to go snuggle in bed with my other baby!

DRUM ROLL PLEASE!!

I failed again...and NO, I am NOT joking. I know, you are laughing, right?!? First of all, thank you Jody. I actually smiled before I had to post my hideous result. 69%!!!!! ONE stinkin' question!!!!! Could I possibly be more frustrated?!!? I tried to quit, but my boss insists that I come in tomorrow to talk about it. I know, I know, I am not a quitter. I'm not so sure. I think I could quit and not be too upset about it. I'll post later when I have a positive take on this. Before I checked my blog, I checked my email and there was a very nice message from Becky. She reminded me that "God uses 'failures' to ask us to trust Him more". Working on that...

A Second Chance

Well, I am taking my exam again tomorrow morning....10:30 am so PRAY HARD! Unforntunately, I can take it as many times as I need to to pass. This better be it. I will post my results...whether good or bad...tomorrow.

I Highly Recommend it!

We ended the day watching Bugs 3D at the IMAX. It was awesome! Real bugs, no animation, in the rainforest. I may have been more amazed than the kids. They loved the glasses and we were all very interested in how it worked with Nalani's eye. But she seemed to see it in 3D as well. Fun Day! They were beat and both slept on the way home. 

A Success

We squeaked by with no major (or minor) issues. The last 20 minutes or so were hit or miss with Nalani getting what we call a little "negative". You know, in that mood where it is like "Oops mom, I accidentally threw my dolly across the IMAX theater, would you get it for me?" And then I get it and believe it or not, she "accidentally" does it again. But we made it and the kids were a riot. They really enjoyed the flower and garden show. In these pics you can see that they got to plant their own flower and they had a bucket with worms in it, so they got their own worm for their plant. There was also an exhibit that had baby ducks in it. Paul's little mind is full of all the overly expense things he can do with our backyard this summer.... 

Big Plans

We are preparing for a fun family day today. We'll see how it goes. I always have these high hopes that get smashed to the ground by a mental breakdown, a minor injury, a temper tantrum or some un-dreamlike situation. Oh well, I'm anxious to just BE a family today. No insurance, no concrete, no computer tests, just us. So it's off to the Garden Show at the Expo Center, maybe a 3D bug flick at the IMAX theater and then home in time for church and kids zone. Praying that it goes smooth. I love Saturday!!

Failure

I failed. No softening the blow...I think that sirens rang and red lights flashed as the word FAILED was in the top left hand corner of my computer screen. TWO QUESTIONS! 68%. So close, yet so far away. So I will be taking this test again next week in Cedar Rapids. I beginning to think it's a sign....

Awkward

So I just got off the phone with Paul and he told me a hilarious story about Brigg. I am sure I cannot begin to capture it in my blog, but I feel as though I need to document it before I forget it. Paul was going to get Brigg ready for bed and he was sitting on Brigg's bedroom floor. He said, "Brigg, come here so I can get those stinky clothes off you." So Brigg walked up to him and I imagine Paul's head was about at Brigg's chest level. Paul pulled down Brigg's pant and once they were down around his ankles Brigg kind of hunched his shoulders over, and covered himself with his hands and had his knees together and said in a very high-pitched voice, "AWK-WARD"! He proceeded to act as though he was going to shuffle out the bedroom door in this position as to get away from this awkward situation. Too funny. Paul said he busted up laughing and could not stop. He said Brigg did it purely for a laugh from Paul and it was just perfectly spoken and timed. Ha! Must get that from his mommy....

Exciting News!!!

I AM GOING TO BE AN AUNT!!! Not in the traditional, 9 months pregnant, 40 pound weight gain, cravings, constant need to pee kind of way; but in a much more unique way. In the try to conceive a baby, go on fertility drugs, go to a million doctors appointments and hope they tell you you ovulated over the course of 18 months, go crazy from your hormones being outta wack and still not be physically pregnant kind of way. The wrestling with options for infertile parents and finally deciding to ADOPT kind of way!!! That's right...Jennie and Sean have started the adoption process and I could not be happier for them or more proud of them! Can you imagine? I mean can you really imagine walking one block in their shoes? Can you imagine being told that the one most important thing in your life that you long for won't ever be? As a mother of 2, I cannot. I cannot fathom how difficult it must be as I sit with my two screaming, fighting children in this room with me. I cannot imagine whalking down the street and seeing pregnant women all around...ones who make irresponsible decisions and would give anything NOT to be pregnant when all I am praying for everyday is for God to give me a child...just ONE child.
Of all the people I have ever known in my lifetime, Jennie and Sean are the two that I have no doubt will take an adopted child into their lives and love him or her even more than they may have loved a child that was physically born to them. It gives me chills to think that at this moment God already has a little being picked out for them. He's already smiling thinking of how wonderful it will be for them to finally meet THEIR baby!
I have to say, I'm a bit jealous of how Jennie's pregnancy is going to go...no stretch marks, no weight gain, no peeing 152 times a day, no dreaded stitches or labor recovery. I think Jennie and Sean are born to be adoptive parents. Can you imagine how blessed this little baby is going to be? It will be so amazing to bring this baby home to a loving home that he or she may have never known if it weren't for 2 perfect people meant to be his or her mom and dad. I can't wait to be an aunt again!!
(For those factual people out there, the average time it takes to get a baby through Bethany Christian Services is 10-14 months)

More with Bode!

Bode, Brenda and Jennie came down for a visit last night and man were we excited! Because I was out of town on Friday, we celebrated St. Patricks Day last night and ate corned beef and cabbage along with roasted potatoes and a couple beers!! Lani cannot get enough of Bode and Bode is amazed by Brigg. It is so cute to see them all together! Bode is starting to crawl all over and he is still loving Nalani's hair. What a fun time! Makes us wish we could see them so much more often... 

Bode Visits

 

Hearts at Home Conference

I got back last night from the Hearts at Home conference. It was a really neat experience. There were something like 6700 mothers there for the weekend. Amazing! I was in 4 workshops and there were 2 keynote speakers...all in the course of ONE day! Talk about information overload! I am still processing and have been waiting to post until I kind of think things through, but oh well. From each speaker I got at least one good or interesting piece of information. It was just somewhat overwhelming to look around at all these women and see that so many of them have the same kinds of hopes and dreams for their children. We were all so different, yet every last one of us was there for the same reason....we are all striving to be the best mother we can possibly be for our children. I don't think a single mother their felt like she had all the answers (even though we all wish we did!!) They all worry about the same kinds of things I worry about everyday, they all pray similar prayers that I pray for my children everyday. They all want to be Godly women who point their children in the right direction and guide them carefully towards a sometimes out of reach goal. It was comforting and overwhelming to be surrounded by all these women. Sometimes you can feel like you are the ONLY ONE in a situation...but it's just not true. Some important things that jumped out at me....
"Your home needs to be a place where the wounded in your family can come to have their wounds healed"
"Your home should be a safe haven. A place they long to come home to, a place of laughter and safety, where they feel like they can ask questions even if you don't have the answers"
"As we laugh together, our hearts soften towards eachother".
(All from Julie Ann Barnhill).
I pray that this is the kind of home Paul and I build for Brigg and Nalani. I pray that they pull out some of the good from each of us and run with it. I pray that they LONG for this home and that they have the courage and that we give them wings to fly. As much as I dread the day I see them walk away from this house, I pray that they do it with excitement and strength and all the while knowing they always have a place to run back to when need be. I especially pray that we give them the example they need to lean on someone so much larger and greater than us. That's a lot of prayin', huh?!?!
There are several other lessons learned, but I am still thinking through many of them. Overall it was a great weekend. It's so nice to be able to look at someone and know that they are thinking exactly the same thing as you and no words even need to be spoken. Many unspoken moments this weekend. Thanks Jody, for sharing this experience with me!

The CHOKE-eyes!

Why do I do this to myself?? I do it every year. I say "I will NOT watch the Hawks play basketball this year." And every year I get sucked in. I SHOULD be packing and preparing the house (as a good wife and mother would) for my weekend away. But NOOOOO....I sit on my butt and watch the Hawkeyes get beat once again in the first round. I'm standing by my promise not to watch Hawkeye basketball next year! I'm sticking to football. Frustrating....

March Madness

This label seems to suit me so far this month! I'm going crazy at work due to the fact that I'm not actually working yet. All I do is study and I don't know how I'm going to make it through the next week! I have tomorrow off and my "Mom's Conference" this weekend. I am looking forward to that retreat! I had an epidural steroid last night for my back issues and I am feeling pretty good. The pain has shifted somewhat and I am just glad it's not in my toosh and down my leg anymore. IB Prophen clears up the dull lower back pain I'm experiencing now. Hoping it's even better by tomorrow. We are holding off our annual St. Patty's Day celebration until Sunday....corned beef and cabbage. Of course a green beer or two as well!!:) I'm a pretty happy mommy...the kids are healthy and have really been enjoying eachother lately. Lani repeats everything Brigg says, it's so cute. And Brigg has really been giggling at Nalani a lot lately. He is sleeping so well at night and I haven't seen him up in our room in the middle of the night for DAYS! Life IS good! I take my commercial license insurance test a week from tomorrow and as soon as I pass that test I will be able to start really working and that will make life easier! We spent the evening watching basketball and checking the results with our work pool selections. You may not know this, but I am quite competetive and really researched my picks:)! Makes the games more fun!! So overall, I cannot complain. Hoping everyone is cozy warm tonight and content with life.

Tuesday

I haven't posted in days and I don't even really want to post this morning. I have been kind of down and out the past couple of days with this crazy weather. Brigg was up in the night again last night with a fever and I don't know what's up with that. He is so sweet. I got him some Motrin and put him in his bed and he asked, "Will you rub my back and scratch my back and tickle me a little bit?" Of course I will!! So I rubbed his back for a bit and then just kind of sat there and looked at him all snuggled in and comfy. He said, "I still don't feel good." I told him his medicine would kick in soon and he would feel better. He seemed satisfied with that response and he rolled over. I thought I'd just sit with him a bit and see that his fever went down. I thought he was sleeping and then he rolled back towards me and said, "Are you going to wait until it kicks in?" I told him yes and he closed his eyes and put his hand on my arm and started to rub it as though he was so very appreciative that I was staying with him and things were going to be ok. His fever did break and I did come back to my own bed, but I had thoughts of sweet little boys dancing in my head as I fell back asleep. I know I write it over and over again, but I just love them so much it makes my heart hurt! Ok, off to work. Hope the sunshine is here to stay. I am sick of being teased by nice weather!!

Friday!

It's Friday...that is a GOOD thing! Good friends, good food and good coffee. Thank goodness for Fridays!!:)

An Oval?

Ok, I just swung by home real quick to pick up some things for taxes over my lunch break and wanted to post this. I had Brigg's preschool parent/teacher conference this morning. They have this little book that shows his progress and things he has done. On one of the pages it shows shapes and he is supposed to identify them and the teacher writes down what he says. He got all of the shapes correct and then the teacher drew an oval and asked him what it was. He replied, "An Aardvark!" Cracked me UP! Anyway, wanted to get it written down while it was fresh in my mind. He's a riot....

Photo

I was trying to get this photo added to my previous post, but had no luck. so here it is! 

Thankful....

Tonight I am thankful. I am thankful for this life I have been given. I am thankful for my husband, for my kids, for my family, for my friends and for McDonalds! As I sit here and think about all my blessings, my heart is just overflowing. I am so thankful for the great gifts and for those minor tragedies that turned into the greatest lessons of my life. I was recently reminded of how Nalani's arrival rocked our world and how my life changed from that moment forward. I was telling someone that life was so easy up to that point. EVERYTHING went my way...truly! I had no reason to "need" anyone or anything outside of my perfect little world. I had grown up in a great family, spread my wings and taken off...traveled practically around the world, fell in love with an amazing man, had a perfect pregnancy and delivery, obtained a college degree and had support everywhere I turned. I guess I just thought that was the way life went. Then Nalani arrived! I know it was not a tragic event, really, but I felt it was. All the precautions I took....thinking about every single thing I put in my body, making sure I did all the things a good mom did while pregnant, just flushed down the drain! How could I have a baby with a defect? I had done everything right. I was in CONTROL of my life! HA! An obvious lesson I needed to learn. I am NOT in control of this life and thank goodness for that! Who would have ever thought that what felt like a full year of battles and struggles and SURGERIES would turn out to be a little bleep on the radar in the whole realm of things. I rarely even think about Lani's eye issues anymore. But I do see how I am a completely different BEING because of her and that year. I recently finished up "Sacred Parenting" and really connected with the author's perspective on how raising children shapes our souls. My soul is forever changed and I am FOREVER thankful for that! Gary Thomas says "After all is said and done, faith is not the power to get whatever we want; it is the spirit to accept whatever God gives." I am thinking you all realize how hard that is for me! Here I thought I WANTED the power, but really I NEEDED to find the spirit to accept what was given to me. I am a million times over thankful for this wacky little girl that God gave me. She has tested me and forced me to grow in ways that I didn't know existed. She and Brigg have shaped me and continue to shape me in new ways. I have the stongest desire to be a better person because of them and the influence I have and will continue to have on them. Ok, enough rambling. Just want to end with one last quote from Gary Thomas (can you tell I loved this book?) "Both men and women can rise to the demands and have their souls shaped accordingly. If we embrace these great and small tests with our spiritual eyes opened, we may even come to cherish the sacrafice required of us, so rewarding do we find the spiritual blessings that follow".

Spontaneous Trip

Late Sunday morning we were sitting around the house after I had just gotten off the phone with Lisa. She had said to me, "I wish you were here to help make some of these final decisions on paint and fixtures!" Also, Donna was there and we hadn't seen her for a while. After I got off the phone Paul and I talked and decided we could make a flying trip to help out, get a quick visit in with Donna, have supper and still be home by 8:30 or 9. So we did it! I think Lisa and Tony have most of their decisions finalized and we all had a ball. The kids attack Paul repeatedly, Lisa taught them how to attack Paul the "right way" (in her mind!), we had a couple drinks and went out to dinner and then headed home. I have uploaded several photos. This one is of the kids laying on the air mattress while Tony bounced them up and down and another of Macy and Nalani doing a CHEERS at dinner. It was a nice time and we were some happy to get in some Nana B, Lisa, Tony and Macy time!

Lisa LOVES her brother...

Lisa didn't think the kids were doing a good enough job beating the crap out of Paul, so she decided to show them how it was done! Paul said he felt and heard several pops in his back and surprisingly his back felt great! Thanks Lisa!

To Infinity and Beyond!!!

Nalani and Macy find no problem flying through the air and bouncing off the air mattress! I think they may have actually been doing tricks in the air!

From Baseballs to Snowballs!

It was fun to wake up to big, fat snowflakes falling this morning. I had cleaned out the kids' closets last night and came across snow pants of Nalani's that had never been put on and snow boots of Brigg's that still had the tags on them from Christmas. I didn't think we were going to get to use them this year. But when we woke up to a winter wonderland this morning, we ate breakfast and bundled up to go scoop and play in the snow. The kids loved it! Ok, so it was fun for a day...now I'm hoping it melts quickly and spring arrives SOON! Hope everyone had a great weekend...

Spring Training

Well, it's official....Spring Training has begun around here. I don't know what it is, but Brigg thinks it's SUMMER out there! He wants to go get ice cream and play baseball all day. I came back from my classes and I brought him a new batting glove and some new baseballs and he hasn't put them down yet. So the boys are outside playing and Lani is napping. It's SO GOOD to be home!!!!
Paul did a great job of keeping it together while I was gone. I'm so proud of him! There were special circumstances 2 out of the four days and he handled them beautifully! Man, I don't know what we would have done without our helpers though...Jody and Andy, Shawna and Brittanie. They all helped out so much! THANKS! So I got home and the house was in pretty good shape. Lani had a little accident today and I went to get her some clean undies. She was all out. So I resorted to putting her in some of Brigg's old Thomas the Tank Engine tighty whities. She is one happy little girl. I may never get her in girly panties again! I think boy style undies are "in" anyway, right? Well, I better get some more time in with Brigg outside while I have the chance. These photos just cracked me up. He is definitely serious about his sports! Hope everyone is enjoying their Saturday as much as we are!

The Result

I passed. That's it. I am going to snuggle with Brigg in my bed and I have a feeling that I will be asleep before he is, so I thought I'd post my results. So glad to be home.....smiling from ear to ear tonight!

11:00 The Night Before

HELLO!! Ok, I am thinking that all these homeowners policies, dwelling policies, farm policies, auto policies and umbrella policies should just be put into one gigantic policy with one set of exclusions and named perils. I am going to revolutionize this industry!!
HA!
Better get back to studying. I'll post my results when I get home tomorrow. If you don't hear from me, it means I failed and I am embarrassed!
Group prayer at 10:30 am!!!

Taking a Break from the Books!

AAAHHHHH!:) Crazy couple of days down and 2 to go. Actually, only a half day tomorrow and then I test on Friday. I stopped by Chris and Brenda's tonight (even though they are not here and Jennie and Sean are) and Jennie made a free meal for me. That was nice!! I thought I'd type a quick post before I headed back to the hotel to hit the books! I have talked to the kids several times and they are adjusting without me, I think. I told Paul not to tell me anymore stories of Lani getting up in the night and crying and walking up to my side of the bed, laying her head where I should be and saying "I want mommy". He can tell me all he wants when I get home and am holding them both in my arms!!! Brigg just keeps saying, "I am going to be SO excited to see you, Mommy!" So am I Brigg.....